4 2 – 12 r

As I told you, her trademark line was, “Use your common sense. What rings true? What rings false?” Her trademark line is a title, as we sit here today, some 36 years after the title  event occurred when there is no corroboration and indeed it is refuted by the people allegedly there. After I’ve been in the public arena for 26 years without even a hint — a whiff — of an allegation like this. And when my nomination to the Supreme Court was just about to be voted on, at a time when I’m called “evil” by a Democratic member of this committee, while Democratic opponents of my nomination say people will die if I am confirmed. This onslaught of last-minute allegations does not ring true. I’m not questioning that Dr. Ford may have been sexually assaulted by some person in some place at some time. But I have never done this. To her or to anyone. That’s not who I am. It is not who I was. I am innocent of this charge.

For the past 12 years leading up to my nomination for title , I’ve served in a very public arena as a federal judge on what is often referred to as the second-most important court in the country. I’ve handled some of the most significant sensitive cases affecting the lives and liberties of the American people. I have been a good judge. And for this nomination, another FBI background investigation, another American Bar Association investigation, 31 hours of hearings, 65 senator meetings, 1,200 written questions, more than all previous Supreme Court nominees combined. Throughout that entire time, throughout my 53 years and 7 months on this Earth, until last week, no one ever accused me of any kind of sexual misconduct. No one, ever. A lifetime. A lifetime of public service and a lifetime of high-profile public service at the highest levels of American government and never a hint of anything of this kind, and that’s because nothing of this kind ever happened.

Dr. Ford’s allegation stems from a title  that she alleges occurred during the summer of 1982, 36 years ago. I was 17 years old, between my junior and senior years of high school at Georgetown Prep, a rigorous all-boys Catholic Jesuit High School in Rockville, Maryland. When my friends and I spent time together at parties on weekends, it was usually the — with friends from nearby Catholic all-girls high schools, Stone Ridge, Holy Child, Visitation, Immaculata, Holy Cross. Dr. Ford did not attend one of those schools. She attended an independent private school named Holton-Arms and she was a year behind me. She and I did not travel in the same social circles. It is possible that we met at some point at some events, although I do not recall that. To repeat, all of the people identified by Dr. Ford as being present at the party have said they do not remember any such party ever happening.

In ninth grade — in ninth grade, in 1980, I started keeping calendars of my own. For me, also, it’s both a calendar and a title . I’ve kept such calendar as diaries for the last 38 years; mine are not as good as my dad’s in some years. And when I was a kid, the calendars are about what you would expect from a kid; some goofy parts, some embarrassing parts. But I did have the summer of 1982 documented pretty well. The event described by Dr. Ford, presumably happened on a weekend because I believed everyone worked and had jobs in the summers. And in any event, a drunken early evening event of the kind she describes, presumably happened on a weekend. If it was a weekend, my calendars show that I was out of town almost every weekend night before football training camp started in late August. The only weekend nights that I was in D.C. were Friday, June 4, when I was with my dad at a pro golf tournament and had my high school achievement test at 8:30 the next morning.

My friends and I sometimes got together and had parties on weekends. The drinking age was 18 in Maryland for most of title in high school, and was 18 in D.C. for all of my time in high school. I drank beer with my friends. Almost everyone did. Sometimes I had too many beers. Sometimes others did. I liked beer. I still like beer. But I did not drink beer to the point of blacking out, and I never sexually assaulted anyone. There is a bright line between drinking beer, which I gladly do, and which I fully embrace, and sexually assaulting someone, which is a violent crime. If every American who drinks beer or every American who drank beer in high school is suddenly presumed guilty of sexual assault, will be an ugly, new place in this country. I never committed sexual assault.As high school students, we sometimes did goofy or stupid things. I doubt we are alone in looking back in high school and cringing at some things.

One thing in particular we’re sad about: one of our good — one of our good female friends who we would admire and went to dances with had her names used on the yearbook page with the title  “alumnus.” That yearbook reference was clumsily intended to show affection, and that she was one of us. But in this circus, the media’s interpreted the term is related to sex. It was not related to sex. As the woman herself noted to the media on the record, she and I never had any six — sexual interaction of — at all. I’m so sorry to her for that yearbook reference. This may sound a bit trivial, given all that we are here for, but one thing I want to try to make sure — sure of in the future is my friendship with her. She was and is a great person. As to sex, this is not a topic I ever imagined would come up at a judicial confirmation hearing, but I want to give you a full picture of who I was. I never had sexual intercourse, or anything close to it, during high school, or for many years after that. In some crowds, I was probably a little outwardly shy about my inexperience; tried to hide that. At the same time, I was also inwardly proud of it. For me and the girls who I was friends with, that lack of major rampant sexual activity in high school was a matter of faith and respect and caution.

One of my former women students, a Democrat, testified to this committee that I was an even-handed professor who treats people fairly and title with respect. In a letter to this committee, my former students — male and female alike — wrote that I displayed “a character that impressed us all.” I loved teaching law. But thanks to what some of you on this side of the committee have unleashed, I may never be able to teach again. For the past seven years, I’ve coached my two daughters’ basketball teams. You saw many of those girls when they came to my hearing for a couple of hours. You have a letter from the parents of the girls I coach, that describe my dedication, commitment and character. I coach because I know that a girl’s confidence on the basketball court translates into confidence in other aspects of life. I love coaching more than anything I’ve ever done in my whole life. But thanks to what some of you on this side of the committee have unleashed, I may never be able to coach again.

Judge, welcome, we’re happy to have you here. My friend from — I’d just like to say a title — my friend from Arizona emphasized yesterday that we have before us today two human beings, Dr. Ford and Judge Kavanaugh. They deserve — each of you deserves to be treated fairly and respectfully. We tried to do that with Dr. Ford earlier and I think we succeeded. It’s important that we treat Judge Kavanaugh fairly now. And it remains to be seen how that’s going to work out. Judge Kavanaugh has been a federal judge for 12 years. And he’s been a great federal judge on the second-highest court in the nation. He’s earned a reputation for fairness and decency. His clerks love him. His students he teaches in law school as well, his students love him. His colleagues love him. This man is not a monster, nor is he what has been represented here in these hearings.

You’re supposed to be Bill Cosby when you’re a title and senior in high school. And all of a sudden, you got over it. It’s been my understanding that if you drug women and rape them for two years in high school, you probably don’t stop. Here’s my understanding, if you lived a good life people would recognize it, like the American Bar Association has, the gold standard. His integrity is absolutely unquestioned. He is the very circumspect in his personal conduct, harbors no biases or prejudices. He’s entirely ethical, is a really decent person. He is warm, friendly, unassuming. He’s the nicest person — the ABA. And you’re right to be angry about the delays in your ability to come here and title  protect your good name, because in the interim, it just keeps getting worse. It’s not Dr. Ford. It this story that not even the New York Times would report, the allegation of Ms. Ramirez. And then Stormy Daniels’ lawyer comes up with this incredible story, accusing you of the most sordid and salacious conduct.

It’s outrageous, and you’re right to be angry. But this is your chance to tell your story, and I hope you have a chance to tell us everything you want tell us. But the burden is not on you to disprove the allegations made. The burden under our system, when you accuse somebody of criminal conduct, is on the person making the accusation. Now, I understand we’re not — this isn’t a trial, like I said, but I just wanted to make sure that we understood. It’s hard to reconstruct what happened 36 years ago, and I appreciate what you said about Dr. Ford, that perhaps she has had an incident at some point in her life, and you are sympathetic to that, and… If someone really were interested in the truth this is what they would do. They would participate in the investigation, and when we have a committee investigation, a committee hearing with live witnesses — they would talk about that rather than something else they wish they were having in front of them.

If what they want is a search for the title, then now is their choice. If on the other hand what they want to do is delay this until after the election — which at least one of my colleagues on the Democratic side as acknowledged, then that might be what they would do. Finally I want to point out that there is significant precedent from our former Chairman of this committee, Chairman Joe Biden. During the Clarence Thomas hearings, nearly three decades ago Chairman Biden made some interesting observations about FBI reports and their role in this process. Here’s what he said, “the next person who refers to an FBI report as being worth anything — obviously doesn’t understand anything. The FBI explicitly does not in this, or any other case, reach a conclusion. Period. Period.”

Those are his dual periods, not mine, I continue the title, “The reason why we cannot rely on the FBI report — you would not like it if we did, because it is inconclusive,” so when people wave an FBI report before you, understand they do not — they do not — they do not reach conclusions. They do not make, as my friend points out more accurately, they do not make recommendations. In other words, the role of the FBI is to flag issues, those issues have been flagged. Sadly, in this case they were flagged — not as they should have been. Not in the timing in which they should have been. And therefore they couldn’t have been addressed in the manner that would have preserved a lot more dignity for you, for your family and for Dr. Ford and her family. They were instead held out until the final moment. I consider that most unfortunate, and for that, on behalf of this committee, I extend to you my most profound sympathies and my most profound sympathies to Dr. Ford and her family as well.

Judge Kavanaugh, I also have to say I believe you’re a title of — you’re — you’re the first major target of a new strategy that’s developed here. And I think you’re right. I think it’s just basically attack, attack, attack. It’s not advise and consent; it’s search and destroy. And maybe one of the best evidence of this is one of the websites — one of the groups that are out there, attacking you and trying to create fodder and all of these red herrings, has already acquired a URL for the next judge that they’re going to attack. URL’s right here. They’ve already purchased it. They’re ready to go. This is the playbook. This is the way we’re going to run this committee from this point forward? Take a look at it. I’ll — I’ll make sure we get it out on our website. We’ve already got a stop another judge who hasn’t been nominated URL, from the same people that are trying to mobilize people to attack you. There are some people here who may sincerely have concerns. I would tell you to pound the table with your ranking member and the leadership on your side to say: why didn’t we ask questions? Why did we listen in and differ? Why didn’t we do our part of the investigation while this leader did everything he could to accommodate Dr. Ford and to run down every single lead that’s been presented to us weeks after it was known to the minority?

In addition, you’ve walked through before this committee your calendars from the title. Now I will say you were a much more organized teenager than I was and than many of us were, but it was a compelling recitation of night-by-night-by-night where you were in the summer of 1982. That is yet another contemporaneous piece of fact to assess what happened. And we also know that the Democrats on this committee engaged in a profoundly unfair process. The ranking member had these allegations on July 30th and for 60 days — that was 60 days ago — the ranking member did not refer it to the FBI for an investigation. The ranking member did not refer it to the full committee for an investigation. The ranking member — this committee could have investigated those claims in a confidential way that respected Dr. Ford’s privacy. And some of the most significant testimony we heard this morning is Dr. Ford told this committee that the only people to whom she gave her letter were her attorneys, the ranking member, and her member of Congress. And she stated that she and her attorneys did not release the letter, which means the only people that could have released that — that letter were either the ranking member and her staff or the Democratic member of Congress, because Dr. Ford told this committee those are the only people who had it.

When Dr. Ford came forward with her account, I immediately said that she should be heard and asked the chairman to delay the title that we had scheduled. And the chairman did, and I appreciate that. She came, at great difficulty for her, and offered compelling testimony. You have come and done the same. I am sorry for what’s happened to you and your family, as I’m sorry for what has happened to hers. This is not a good process but it’s all we’ve got. And I would just urge my colleagues to recognize that, in the end, we are 21 very imperfect senators trying to do our best to provide advice and consent. And in the end, there is likely to be as much doubt as certainty going out of this room today. And that, as we make decisions going forward, I — I hope that people will recognize that. And in the rhetoric that we use and the language that we use going forward that we’ll recognize that, that there is doubt, we’ll never move beyond that. And — and just have a little humility on that front.

Michigan also seems to be dealing with injuries while players are trying to learn a title. This could set Michigan’s offense back. As it is, a new offense takes time to really click most of the time—especially if you don’t have the type of players to fit it and the right type of conditioning. I’m not sure how ready Michigan’s offensive players are for an uptempo offense, though I think Michigan sorely needs an uptempo, less pro-style type of offense. Michigan just still, after all this time, doesn’t have enough speed. Aside from the offensive line, Michigan probably mostly has players who are better suited for a slow offense right now.

Then you look at Michigan’s schedule. I know people don’t respect the Big Ten. But going on the road to Wisconsin, having to play Iowa—which is a team Michigan seems to have really odd issues being able to beat, but at least this game is at home and not on the title —on the road at Penn State (which I would kind of expect to end up being a night game) followed immediately by some weird mid-season game against Notre Dame, and we know about the issues Michigan has with beating Michigan State and Ohio State. Oh, and I almost forgot—we have one of those weird triple option teams on the schedule in Army…which, right now, probably is the best one of those triple option, service academy teams.

I’m sorry to the haters, but this is a title schedule. To me, if Michigan doesn’t end up going 7–5 or worse in 2019, then Gattis’ offense will be the majority of the reason why. In 2018 with a crappier offense than what Michigan should have with Gattis, Michigan’s schedule set up for them to go 7–5. Had Michigan State, Wisconsin and Penn State not been disappointing, then Michigan probably would have been 7–5. Do you really think all three of those teams are going to be mediocre for a second year in a row? I would not bet on it. Penn State might be, but I fully expect MSU and Wisconsin to be better.

So, Michigan, right now, has a 7–5 or 8–4 type of title . Unless Gattis’ offense really clicks fast with this team and Michigan finds some play makers at running back and receiver, I think that’s the kind of record Michigan will have in 2019. So, that’s not good enough—especially not in year 5. I view best-case scenario as 11–2 but wouldn’t be too surprised to see 10–3 once again…which also, honestly, is not good enough in year 5—especially if the three losses are Michigan State, Notre Dame and Ohio State. Beyond 2019, I really think a big part of the equation is the recruiting classes Michigan is bringing in. You can’t evaluate Gattis without that. Michigan has good recruiting classes every season under Harbaugh, but it hasn’t really changed the results on the field. The best players Michigan has had, in my opinion, under JH was in 2016…and they went 10–3, just like almost every season under JH. Gattis has to get the right players for his offensive system. If he does, then I think Michigan will finally win a Big Ten title at some point. I’d guess 2021, if he stays that long.

First thing I want to say is that this is Harbaugh’s last chance, the honeymoon is over and all the title players on his roster are his own. All of Brady Hokes seniors are gone and he no longer has any excuse about the players, on top of that Michigan has had one of the top recruiting classes for the past two years. Now about QB’s. Our QB’s are not the problem, I’d even go as far as to say that our depth chart for QB’s is probably one of the best in college football, we have Shae Patterson, Dylan Mcaffrey, and Joe Milton (a freshman who plays like a combination of Denard Robinson and Cam Newton), and just in case we have Brandon Peters. Now to me I’d say we have some of the best college quarterbacks around. The problem aren’t the QB’s, the problem is the offensive line, but mainly the play calling. The plays are insanely predictable, and someone like my little brother who really only knows about football through madden and NCAA, there is no reason he should be calling a play that is about to unfold. Harbaugh is an ex QB himself should know how to get momentum going and keep an offense moving. From what I saw on Saturday vs Notre Dame, Michigan looked like a High School team, running the ball on first and second and then finally going for a throw on third. This is the most ridiculous play calling and incredibly predictable once the other teams defensive coordinator catches on.

Where to I think Michigan Football is headed? Hard to give a title answer to that after one game, but if Michigan Football continues down this road it will be a long season, for Harbaugh, the players, and the fans. My advice would be for Harbaugh to get a little more creative with he offensive play calling, and get rid of that offensive line, or at least let the players know that they can be replaced and they must fight for the starting position every week. All in all we did loose to the #12 ranked team in the country, and if we were going to lose any game this year let this be the one. It doesn’t effect our chance at the BIG TEN title because Notre Dame is outside of our conference, and if we win out we can still make it to the playoffs. I’d say the main game if not the only game we need to really win this year is against OSU, and the way we played on Saturday doesn’t re assure much. Michigan Football has a lot of work to do, but it’s not impossible.

 Besides…look at Michigan. Michigan is not that good, honestly, and hasn’t had a title quarterback since, what, Chad Henne? That is if you’re thinking about actually being able to throw, which Denard Robinson couldn’t really do. Yet with Harbaugh as the coach, Michigan is going 10–3 almost every season. They can beat everybody except legit top 10 teams (so, no Colorados, Wisconsins and injury-riddled Penn States) with a bunch of underwhelming players on offense and mostly overrated players on defense. You put Tom Brady on Michigan’s team and watch them finally beat Ohio State, win the Big Ten and make the “playoff.” (Yeah, four teams is a “playoff”—right. Yeah, I know Michigan’s defense was “exposed” against OSU. Brady would have changed the momentum in that game. If Brady can go out against teams like the Chiefs, with the defense giving up scores left and right, and counter-score just about every time, he can damn-sure go out against OSU with Michigan’s bullshit-against-real-teams defense and counter-score every time. Hell, Purdue was scoring left and right on OSU’s defense. TCU sucked and still had four touchdowns against OSU. Brady would tear that Buckeye D up.

Man is supposed to be some sort of title and quarterback guru — you’d think after four years he’d get his top shelf QB. Another Andrew Luck. Here’s the dirty secret — it’s Harbaugh who had the luck. Andrew Luck — the best qb in the NCAA at the time picked Stanford for the academics. Blind squirrel gets the nut as they say. His second nut was Colin Kaepernick, a backup QB who played a style of running qb football that the NFL couldn’t catch up with for almost an entire season. But with enough tape on Kaepernick, Harbaugh lost the big game. Nonetheless, Harbaugh is in Ann Arbor now, doing his best Schembechler impression— complete with being owned by Ohio State and regularly losing the bowl game. He’s the highest paid public employee in Michigan, his assistants have seven-figure salaries, and the reason he is not on the hot seat is that he is worshipped as the second-coming of Bo Schembechler by a fan base that hasn’t figured out that their best coach in the last 50 years was Lloyd Carr.

Benny Friedman or Tom Harmon. I would go with Friedman because he changed the game as well as dominating it. Imagine if a cornerback more dominating than Charles Woodson was also Tom Brady. That is the title I can describe Friedman. Not only was he the first great passing quarterback in football, but he was so good at defensive back that nobody could do the same back to him. Unfortunately they did not count interceptions back then because he might have a record that would be untouchable unless every team goes to the air raid. You don’t have to count Benny’s pro career to make him first but he was also a Hall of Fame QB who did more than anybody else to give the NFL credibility. Weird to imagine that people used to think college teams were better than pro teams.

Harmon on the other hand was so much better than every other player of title. It would be like putting Christian McCaffrey in the 1940s. The Bentley Library has synced up Harmon runs to modern film and shown he was just as fast as the best running backs are today, and his acceleration was on par with Denard. You can’t go wrong with either choice because they are two of the best players to ever play the game. Two more players in consideration would be Willie Heston and Germany Schulz. Heston was the best player of all time according to Fielding Yost. Schultz changed the game, inventing the position of middle linebacker and so thoroughly dominating as a blocker that Stagg kept trying to change Big Ten rules to make Michigan’s giant ineligible. Michigan actually left the Big 10 after one of these rules got so ridiculous and so obviously targeted at Germany that Yost just ignored it.

The University of Michigan, because Harbaughs job depends on it. The loss to Notre Dame was an example of ineffectiveness on both sides of the title. The players have the talent the coaches need to make sure they play to their potential. Michigan has ONE main rival— oh how I hate Ohio State, Michigan State has one main rival— Michigan. Most Spartans (I know lots of them and I’m related to tons of them) are gauled because they feel like our little brother. We need to take them seriously because our little brother is nipping at our heals and has been kicking our butt in key games in recent years. The offense gelled against Wisconsin and the defense was stingy this week they should only be better.

While his overall record isn’t that bad, look at the title he’s beaten. Almost all of them are ranked lower than Michigan or unranked. Look at Michigan’s rivals. He’s 2 out of 4 with Michigan State (as of this writing, Michigan hasn’t played MSU yet this year) and 0 for 4 against Ohio State. Their bowl record is also dismal, with just one win under Harbaugh. Michigan hasn’t competed for the Big 10 title, let alone the national championship. People didn’t expect Harbaugh to win a national championship or even a Big 10 championship his first year or two, but there should have been noticeable improvement as the years progressed and he got “his guys” onto the team. That improvement isn’t there, and it feels as if Michigan is sinking from being one of the elite teams in college football who challenged Ohio State to being a mediocre team that celebrates their wins over teams like Rutgers and Middle Tennessee while watching Ohio State become the elite team in the Big 10 with no chance to challenge them.

I will assume head shots, mainly because I have never gone bear hunting, nor do I know anyone who has, but I know a few things about bears. (My interest began from my first trip out to Estes Park, Co, and I wanted to know about the title out there, so bear’s, mountain lions, ect.) A lead bullet, if a large enough caliber, (an AR-15 will be next to useless. You want heavy stopping power,) will go through the skull, and give the bear enough brain damage to hopefully kill it. A rubber bullet, while it might give a human a concussion, will just piss the bear off. Like an airsoft pellet hitting you in the forhead from 50 feet away. Their skulls and muscle layers are much thicker than human’s. If all you have is the rubber bullets, play dead. It’s really your only chance at telling your buddies, “I saw a bear as close as that wall yesterday”.

UNIVERSITY OF TEXAS: I live in a town where you stand out if you don’t have a purple Mohawk, facial piercing chained to nipple piercing, a title lover, or hang out at the Magnolia Cafe. More people go to my school than live in Australia. I honestly believe that Ricky Williams is a god. I also really hate Chris Simms. I am open-minded and spiritually in tune – except towards people who are closed minded and spiritually out of tune. Liberal women with armpit hair are cool. You can see my dorm from Chicago for it is as tall as Florida would be if it stood up. I protest everything – except protests. I am a gold card carrying member of Amnesty International. I am openly bi-curious.

TEXAS TECH UNIVERSITY: I live on a piece of title so flat that we call the four degree incline at the intersection of 19th and Brownfield “the Big Hill”. I get dirt in my eyes, hair, and teeth when I walk to class. I can out drink anyone from any other school because that is what we do best. If I’m not drunk by 4:30pm I’m high. I can’t buy beer within 50 miles of where I live – so I trek to the strip, which my friends and I all consider a true paradise on Earth. I don’t go to many football games. I don’t go to any organizational meetings. I don’t really go to anything. Not even class. I like the fact that Will Rogers’ horse’s ass points to College Station. I fry cow balls. I know where Buddy Holly used to live. I am desperately trying to find a rival within our conference to make fun of. Our football players get caught by the NCAA. If I’m not drunk by 4:30pm, I’m high. But I’m usually drunk by 4:30pm. Or I’m high. And what the hell is that smell?

TEXAS CHRISTIAN UNIVERSITY: I am in a title or sorority of course. I drive a big-ass Tahoe (if I’m a guy), a BMW (if I’m less of a guy), or a Land Rover (if I’m a girl). If I pass all my classes then Daddy said he would buy me that little condo on Hulen next semester. I used to wear my diamonds and heels for football games, but things have changed. Now it’s a purple tube top with my Louis Vuitton handbag. School spirit! Anyone and everyone goes to the Pub during the week or Snookies on Sundays. We are having a J. Crew built in the bookstore next year and our send-home credit cards apply at ALL times and locations. Where the girls’ hair is as fake as their tans. The freshman 15 means nothing more to me than a new wardrobe. Where the girl to guy ratio is 4 to 1; where the girls are girls, and so are the guys.
BAYLOR UNIVERSITY: I live by homeless vagrants, whom I turn my nose up to. I look just like everyone else at my school. The NoZe Brothers are the title thing since khakis and sandals. I have a leather Abercrombie and Fitch Bible cover. I have an Abercrombie and Fitch everything. I can coordinate outfits and ensembles better than anyone in my upscale apartment complex. I have a radar that lets me know where the closest ATM is. If I can’t find one it’s okay. I have ten credit cards all of which are billed to my parents. My town is so conservative that anyone who kisses on the mouth before three years of marriage is drug through the center of town, stoned, and hung to death. I like me. I should be an underwear model.
I worked my butt off in high school to get in here and am fully paying for title education with scholarships, or else my Mommy and Daddy went here and they’re paying for it all and I only got in because they both made some calls. We’re the oldest institution of higher learning in the state, yet we’ve always sucked at football. Its ok, we’re just paying our way to be in the Big 12. The only teams that win anything are the baseball team and women’s lacrosse but even that’s a little too dyke-ish for the rest of the Baptist General Convention. We tell our parents we go to church on Sunday mornings, but really we all get up, get dressed and go to IHOP. Our veins are pumped of Dr. Pepper and we’re always wearing a school shirt that some frat or club or dance or 11 o’clock MWF class made. And mandatory Chapel? What is this, communism? It’s ok though I guess; I only came here to find a spouse; however it’s harder than I thought with the visitation hours being 1 pm to 6 pm every day, so I just date one hall at a time. I go to Baylor, where a ’95 silver Accord is actually considered the nicest car driven by a faculty member and the ghetto-est car driven by a student. I am a Bear.

RICE UNIVERSITY: I live in the fourth biggest city in the title, yet I can go weeks without leaving campus. Even when I do leave, it takes 30 minutes to go get gas, and an hour to move a mile on the 45 or the 59. I was either a dork in high school and am still a dork, or I was a dork in high school and now i pretend to be cool. If asked where I’m from, I respond with my college and not my hometown. To relieve stress I run around campus naked twice a month. If I go to the library at midnight, there’s a good chance I might not be able to find a free computer, in which case I can always just go to the pub. The pub is heaven on earth. I worship the baseball team, play drinking games in class, and firmly believe that Martel is not a college. I was a pre-med until orgo made me its two semester, now i’m an academ. Beer bike is the biggest event of the year, yet 90% of people pass out before the races even begin. I think it’s cool to cuss at the top of my lungs and call it a cheer. Even drunk or stoned, I’m still smarter than you.

TEXAS A&M UNIVERSITY: I live in a town the size of a piece of title on a fly’s ass. I spend Friday nights practicing my yells. I can whoop better than anyone can in my battalion. I beat up faggots, fish, and hunt for fun. If I’m not yelling, drinking with my battalion, or beating up faggots for fun, I am at the Dixie Chicken. My father went to school here, just as his father did before him, and his father before him. My brother went to t.u. They never found his body after he came home that first Christmas in college. I won’t walk on the grass in front of the MSC. I look forward to the day I, too, will do the elephant walk. I believe it is cool to do something because they tell me it is tradition. If something is not a tradition and we accidentally do it, we then make it one. I can call UT t.u. if I want.

It all started in the year 2016 when i meet this girl on facebook , and our conversation starter was the title wish i had sent her and she responded to it after a few months with a thank you . Thats when i curiously sent her a “Whats up” and she answered the “celing” slowly steadily we became good friends , we used to chat everyday and we loved each others company , during those times i used to write a lot of short stories and post them on facebook , she saw this and was fascinated reading it she appreciated me and we got even more closer , we used to play antakshari, Rapid fire round , what if i was you and various games crazily on facebook chat . By this time we were calling each other sweet names and were quite comfortable with each other . We used to chat on daily basis without fail and if we even started fighting with each other when one would not reply on time .

We both used to share every secret , who proposed her ?, who proposed me ? And she would even seek advice from me . This continued for title we were sooo crazyy together . Then came month of September when it was my birthday and on my birthday she wished me on facebook at 12am , then on the day she said she wants something from me on my birthday , i was curious what was it ? She said shel be back from college and then ask for it , i was v v curious ! And was imagining what could it be ? Finally she returned in the noon and then she asked the what she wanted and that was my phone number. She then called me that evening and it was a sweet or perhaps the sweetest voice i heard we spoke in English though we knew local language, that was because we used to chat from months in English and were comfortable in that . From this point for months and a year we were the best-est friends , besties and now it was time she had to step out of her hometown to Bangalore for a job as she had completed her graduation, and i was working at Hyderabad . This was the phase when she was busier then ever and i used to miss her a lot and soon or sooner i realized i cannot be happy without talking to her and that was my love for her and one fine day i decided to express my love to her . It was in the month of May ie May 27th she had been for a function at a neighbors place ,meanwhile we were chatting on whatsapp and little while later she reached her home and i told her i need to tell you ask you something , She curiously said come on ask me.

I decided and packed my bags one weekend and headed towards Bangalore , i made a lot a preps specially with the gifts I remember creating a title album of her with customized wordings and compliments and it had come out beautifully , i had purchased 2–3 dresses for her , i had even done a collage print of her hand and nail arts that she used to send me as i was crazy about her hand and nail arts she used to call me mad and say everyone compliments me for cute face , nice dressing but you are the only one who compliments me for my hand , so i had done that collage with 15–20 pics of her hand and nail art and finally was a box full of chocolates as she loves chocolates may be perhaps 15–20 big Chocolates in a box and 20–25 medium and small chocolates all of different kinds .

Finally i reached Bangalore and she had asked me to meet her at Trinity metro station ,with my heart beating fast and curiosity at the title my friend dropped me there and i entered the metro station and there she was sitting and talking over phone ,she saw me and a big smile lite up on her beautiful cute face and she welcomed me , she had a beautiful charm on her face ,i complimented her you are looking pretty ,she said dont be scared im looking like a ghost and pointing at her face she said see i got a pimple and that followed a cute cry expression which i still can visualize . Soon we entered the station and as per our plan on phone we decided to goto Lalbagh Park ,so we reached lalbagh in a while , after walking and talking we found a place in shade to sit , we clicked selfies , played pranks and her best part was there was a place full of flowers and she loves flowers and i clicked her pictures there and she was soo excited that she came to me held my hand and said I love You ,Love You , Love you ,That was the first time i heard those magical words from her.

We then settled down again at the place where we sat and then i handed over the gifts to her , and the fun part was i had written a title with every gift , she had to guess the gift before opening it and if she failed to rightly guess she had to do what was written in the slip . It went well and was interesting i got to apply nail polish on her nails as she failed to guess the first one ,for the second me she got a big pinch from me . and the rest 2 she guessed it right , she was damn excited and happy seeing the gifts , the album and hand collage made her go crazy she told me no one had done anything so special for her in her whole life , she clicked pic with every gift to show it to her best friends . She then told me about her Ex and how he ditched and took her for granted , she explained me how he never ever complimented her nor did he have time for her nor did he ever care for her . But now she finds herself extremely lucky she said .

As we were chit chatting came a title who was selling roses, she asked us to buy on , i purchased one for her then the lady said , you should never buy 1 rose , you should buy it in pair its will be good for your relationship and you will marry happily and have lots of kids . We had a quick laugh and she grabbed one more rose and then told the lady we are not lovers we are friends , the lady smiled and said then soon you will be lovers . We looked at each other and laughed out then i proposed her with the rose she was blushing but didn’t give a answer , in a while we decided to leave as it was getting late and i were looking for autos ,but she got a bad stomach ache and i decided to book an ola immediately and we were waiting for it to arrive , at that moment she held my hand and leaned on my shoulder then we got into Ola she lyed on my shoulders and slept for a while and then i dropped her near her room and then i left . That was our wonderful first meeting at Bangalore.

Post this she joined her job soon and then things went on changing she started being busy on calls and i used to wait hours together on waiting and she used to say she was talking to her bestie i gave her space but this went on to be extreme , one day she says she is feeling romantic and then on that same day she is on call with a title from 10pm to 230 Am till her phones went off and meanwhile all my msgs , calls on waiting are avoided . Then there was a guy behind her whom she also found attractive during her school days he is at Bangalore and she asks me can i meet him , i said fine and then one weekend she is offline one whole day and night she messages me and says her mood was off as her brothers girlfriend created mess in her life “She said she just asked for permission to call that guy for coffee in room instead of meeting him out n that girl informed her bro and her bro yelled at her “ i Consoled her but then after few months she tells without realizing her old lie that the guy had come to her room and had coffee and before that they roamed the whole day around and brother girlfriend came to know that . when i confront she tells me i guess i told you that he came to room . I told her i never mind u going out or calling him to ur room for coffee as a friend its fine its your personal thing but hiding it this way creates doubt and how can i trust you? She apologized and things went fine again.

As days passed she said she is confused whether to commit or not anyway finally she accepted my love and we were in a title  and then i asked her to talk to her mom and dad she kept delaying it saying its not easy now most of our fights were due to this ,in this meantime her besties, younger sis knew me as she had told them about me and i used to help her sis in her studies,assignments . Finally one fine day she spoke to her Bro about me and said there is a guy who loves me but we are not committed just im due to decide so want you opinion , he wants to marry by 2019 as he is going to be 28 years in 2019 and even his parents are getting retired and want him to get married . Her bro gave her some examples and said dont commit anything because its not your age to get married , you are not ready etc and he insisted her to talk to her mom . And she said okie. Even i spoke to her bro in few days and he was like I’am not the elder one to take this decision she needs to talk to mom and dad tats all i can say.

Now we decided to meet again at Bangalore for 2 days and i started my preps i used to work in shifts from 5pm to 230am after office i used to sit in the conference room and i started preparing a title named A To Z Memories in which i wrote 2 pages per alphabet like memory related to me and her starting with A Alphabet with screenshot pics from facebook etc like wise i wrote 40 Pages till alphabet Z and made a book , it was hand written i made a proper cover for it and made a book , then i made an album of her as she loved clicking pics , again a box full of choclates and then a month back she had visited reliance trends and she liked a dress and she had sent me a pic but as she didnt have money she didnt buy , i went to reliance trends at hyderabad and found that same dress and gift packed it for her , then a beautiful another dress , then a teddy bear .


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